I Am Worth It

I Am Worth It

Photo via Redvers on Flickr

Yesterday I relaxing after our Christmas celebration, and for some reason a co-worker from many years ago popped into my head.  He was someone I worked with before Jason and I got married while I was going to college.  During the time I worked with him, I alternated between thinking he was funny and enjoying his company and thinking he was annoying and counting the days until either he or I quit.  We didn’t have much in common, and he had a way of saying things that got on my nerves.  We were not close friends by any one’s definition.

One day, (I have no idea why) the conversation turned to whether or not Jason and I were “shacking up” before we got married.  We were not, and I told him that.  He was something near incredulous when I told him that.  He said something like, “Jason is missing out on a lot of fun!”  I remember looking at him and saying, “He’ll wait.  I’m worth it.”  He didn’t have much to say after that.  Needless to say, I’m guessing the conversation didn’t go at all as he had expected.*

Jumping back to the present, I am now married to Jason (for 8 1/2 years), and the mother of three amazing boys (5 years, 3 years, and 2 months).  I got to thinking about whether or not I still believe that I’m worth it, not so much about waiting for the shacking up now but for putting my own needs and some wants at the top of the list.  If I need to schedule time away from my husband and kids for exercising, am I worth it?  Am I worth it if I realize that I no longer have any pants that fit and just a few shirts?  If I decide I want to work on getting more fruits and veggies (which are more expensive than some of the other options at the store) into my diet, am I worth it?  Eight and a half years ago, I would have smiled and told you firmly that of course I am worth it.  Now, I’ve slipped completely into mom/wife-ness, and I will tell you I’m worth it as long as it doesn’t affect my husband or children too much.  Of course I’m worth it, but…  If you’re a parent or a spouse, I’m guessing that most of you will admit you’ve been in this place at one time or another.

This isn’t a New Year’s resolution post.  This is more of a post-baby, life is settling down in the new house kind of post.  So, as it happens to be New Year’s Eve in less than a week, I guess that this is a fine time to start some new habits, right?  I am going to start posting regularly about my efforts to take care of myself.  In the near future, I see these posts centering around two main areas.  One is my physical health.  The other is living a life of intention.

Taking care of myself physically is something I tend to overlook.  I had a (nearly 10 pound) baby just over two months ago.  Before I got pregnant with him, I was not at a weight I was very happy about.  I haven’t been exercising regularly for a while, and in addition to affecting my weight, I think that I get sick more easily and more often.  I’m tired of getting sick!  To do this, I’m going to be participating in the #Mamavation Twitter campaign.  This is a weekly blogging carnival in addition to regular interaction with other like-minded moms on Twitter.

Living a life of intention is something that’s been on my mind for quite a while.  I’m really excited to be a part of Amber Strocel’s CraftingMyLife upcoming course.  I’m sure I’ll be talking about it, and I can’t wait for her to solve all my problems and answer all my life direction questions.  🙂  (Just kidding.  I’m really only expecting her to answer *some* of those questions, not all of them.  Kidding again…kind of.)

So, as I move into 2011, I’m looking forward to the changes that putting myself on the list of priorities will bring.