- You think to yourself, “Wow. I’m really happy. ” Not just today. Not just right now, but with my life.
- You find yourself diagnosed with an auto-immune disease (celiac disease) and so many things begin to make sense.
- You think to yourself “I’m awesome” after you walk/run a 5k.
- In the same day that you don’t get more than 5 minutes in a row to work on any one thing, you also know that you can’t wait to go back to school to get another degree.
- You may have finalized the design for your very first tattoo.
- You are reading an amazing book and want to tell everyone you see about it.
- You have lost 20 pounds and feel better than you can remember feeling in over a decade (see previous point about things making sense after a diagnosis).
I have realized that the empty box of the Add New Post page feels very overwhelming to me. It also feels like a long term commitment I may not be ready to make. I used to blog regularly. I also got into the Twitter/BlogHer/social networking world of blogging. I felt more and more pressure to have page views and to blog regularly. When I mentioned to some “big” bloggers that I didn’t feel like I had anything to say all that regularly, the advice I got was to write one or two posts a week and do memes two or three times a week. That’s probably great advice. Unfortunately, for me, it didn’t resonate, and instead of blogging less, I stopped altogether.
I’m not sure what happened. I don’t know if it was the celiac or if it was something else. Whatever it was, *something* happened this spring. I feel like so many things in my life are coming together. I finally have the motivation to go with my efforts to get back into shape. I am eating very well and feeling no deprivation. I feel more patient with my children. I have a timeline for going back to school and working toward a degree. I have wonderful friends. With three friends moving away this summer, I was feeling a bit melancholy about having lived here for almost 15 years, but lately the awesomeness of my friends has overwhelmed me. You know you have good friends when someone can tell you that the new bra you bought makes “the girls” look really nice.
The final straw that got me back to this empty box and helped me get words into it was realizing that two of my very favorite blogs are updated irregularly. They aren’t every day bloggers. There might be three posts one week and then not another one for three weeks. Regardless, when the posts do come, I am really happy and excited to read them.
So, with that, I begin again to share my attempts to live a life of intention while being content with what I have right now.
P.S. Now I want to go back and link to ALL my favorite blogs. Maybe I’ll do that down the line.