Equally Shared Parenting

A few months ago I was attempting to write a post for the Carnival of Natural Parenting.  The description of the month’s topic was:

November 2010: What is Natural Parenting?: Explore one concept from the natural parenting philosophy – why is it important to you/your family?

I knew right away what I wanted to write about.  I was going to write about Equally Shared Parenting.  So, I started where every good writer starts.  I googled it.  I found the website for Marc and Amy Vachon’s book by the same name.  I started writing my post.  I wrote about how we share the child raising, house work, recreation, and then I got to breadwinning.  We don’t share that.

Jason has a career that he enjoys.  He likes what he does.  He is good at it, and he wants to continue to do it for some time.  I went to school for education.  I have a double major in elementary and middle school education with areas of concentration (similar to minors) in math and history.  I also have a masters degree in special education with the general strategist certification.  I, unfortunately, do not have a career that I enjoy and want to return to.

So, while as much as I like to think that we are practicing equally shared parenting, we are not.  Jason shares all the responsibility for the tasks around the house and with the kids, but I do not share any of the responsibility of breadwinning.  I could explain why we’ve chosen for it to be this way, but in the end it really comes down to the fact that I don’t work.  Right now, I’m okay with not working (for money), and eventually I hope to return to a career.  However, shouldering all the responsibility for this area is a lot.

(As a side note, remind me in the future that my 5 year old cannot nap for more than 30 minutes or he will be up at 9:45 just tossing and turning in his bed.)

So, as I was trying to write that post, I realized that in the future Jason and I may very well practice equally shared parenting, we don’t right now.  Some days I’m okay with that, and some days I wish it was different.  Some days I feel guilty about asking him to share all the other responsibilities of our family but not sharing in the breadwinning.

I have some other thoughts on careers, motherhood, etc.  I may share some of them in the future, but until then I don’t have anything to neatly wrap up my thoughts on this.  I don’t have a great response question for anyone who might read this.  I guess I just thought I’d put this out there and see what happens.

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